This probably isn’t a big deal to most people, but I’m taking this death pretty hard. I already bought its replacement. I didn’t like my scale, we aren’t friends. But I don’t know how to live without checking on my weight (even though the numbers refuse to move). I’m not replacing it with the one I really want because I don’t want to spend $130 on a bathroom scale. I’m just going to get a cheap one for now.
Project Me is again in full swing. Starting today blogging will be added to my Project Me plans. I also, it seems, need to find friends. I have some great friends but apparently I’m supposed to build myself a support system while I’m going through Project Me. My friends are great but most of them are incredibly busy and I know I need someone going through the journey with me.
I recently read Made to Crave and The Daniel Plan. Both of those books are spiritually based in my faith and both books were awesome, knowledgeable, and encouraging. I tried joining in an online bible study based on Made to Crave but it was too big and I felt lost trying to participate so I went it solo. I have been emailing with a friend who asked for extra support. So last night I was reading The Daniel Plan after I did my yoga and I was on the chapter about friends. I realized I don’t have the type of friends they are describing. I don’t have that close knit support system that most fitness/health based things I’ve read (Christian or not) say is vital to success. I tried to think about it last night and think about my Besties (who I would go to the ends of the Earth for) and realized that they have their own lives and their own challenges right now and none of them are embarking on a life change like this. While I have no doubt they would listen to me ramble on and on about it, I know they wouldn’t relate the same as someone who was going through it.
So I put that that aside and went to bed. I decided it wasn’t really that important and that I don’t really need the friends they were talking about in the books. I went to sleep and had weird dreams about being alone. It was kinda creepy, if we’re being honest here. Now, I have great people in my life and I don’t feel like I don’t have friends. Admittedly the closest people to me live out of state which makes it impossible to really be social so I don’t have a social life, but having a social life means time away from my kids and I don’t like that at all.
I wake up this morning and find the church email newsletter in my email. I’m reading through it an realize that Pastor has written about the need for friends. I believe someone is trying to tell me something.